[[Sauron is sitting at a bar with a drink, beret guy is his bartender, wiping a glass.]]
Background music: All the single ladies, all the single ladies...
Beret guy: Hey, Sauron. Why so glum? 
Sauron: Gil-Galad saw through me and threw me out of Undon. Galadriel, too. I'll never rule 
anyone
 at this rate.

[[Close up on Sauron, waist up.]]
Background music: All the single ladies, all the single ladies...
Sauron: Eru created such beautiful creatures -- elves and men and dwarves -- and all I've got are these stupid Orcs.

[[Full body view of Sauron on barstool, arms raised.]]
Background music: 'Cause if you liked it then you should have put a ring on it...
Sauron: I mean, I--

[[Same view, arms lowered as realization dawns on him.]]
Background music: 'Cause if you liked it then you should have put a ring on it...

{{Title text: Using a ring to bind someone you covet into your dark and twisted world? Wow, just got the subtext there. Also, the apparently eager Beyoncé would've made one badass Nazgûl.}}