Girl (on the phone): Can my boyfriend come along?
Guy: I'm not your boyfriend!
Girl: You totally are.
Guy: I'm casually dating a number of people.
Girl (pointing to a chart): But you spend twice as much time with me as with anyone else. I'm a clear outlier.
Guy: Your math is irrefutable.
Girl: Face it - I'm your statistically significant other.
{{title text: ... okay, but because you said that, we're breaking up.}}