[[Voices are coming from behind a door with a sign that reads "Debian Linux HQ"]]
First voice: Problem: One of the volunteer developers has a date this weekend. Dates lead to romance, romance leads to orphaned projects.
Second voice: What's the plan?
First voice: We're hiring him a relationship coach. He's like Will Smith in "Hitch," but he only gives bad advice.
[[Man in black hat is talking to another man, who is standing in from of a mirror]]
Man in black hat: Okay, remember: The key to conversation is constructive criticism.
Man in black hat: You need to show you're smart enough to solve her problems.
Man in front of mirror: Makes sense.
{{title text: His date works for Red Hat, who hired a coach for her, too.  She advised her to 'rent lots of movies like Hitch.  Guys love those.'}}