t=0 nanoseconds
Person 1: This is called Bell's Theorem.  It was first-

((distance marker cross-panel indicating 5 meters between Person 1 and Person 2))

t=1 nanosecond
Person 2: Wow, faster-than-light communication is possible!

Bell's Second Theorem:  Misunderstandings of Bell's Theorem happen so fast that they violate locality.

{{Title text: The no-communication theorem states that no communication about the no-communication theorem can clear up the misunderstanding quickly enough to allow faster-than-light signaling.}}