[[Two characters meet.  One is wearing a beret.]]
Character: Any New Year's resolutions?
Bereted character: Gonna figure out what email is.
Character: ...
Email?


Bereted character: People always say they're sending them.  They sound really into it, so I always nod, but I have no idea what it is.
Character: You have an address on your website!

[[The bereted character looks thoughtful.]]
Bereted character: Oh, 
that's
 what that thing is.
Character: Email is important! You can't just 
never
 check it.  It's not like voicemail.

Bereted character: Can't they just send messages 
normally?

Character: How?
Bereted character: Fax! Or snapchat.
Character: ... The naked pic thing?
Bereted character: Fax machines aren't 
just
 for faxting!

{{Title text: My New Year's resolution for 2014-54-12
30
14 Dec:12:1420001642 is to learn these stupid time formatting strings.}}